What would’ve made your college experience more enjoyable?

04Jun09

Very popular question that I’ve been asked since last quarter by my peer counselor. Anyways here is my list:

1. Spend more time with the people here and  less time with the friends back home: This was the first thing that I told   my counselor our of all the things I could’ve possibly said, I ended up saying this one first. The more I think about it, the more true my answer has become. It’s just i don’t know because sometimes your friends and family back home do hold you back. But there are more details later.

2. Should’ve really stuck with my plan on moving out rather than commuting – because it’s supposedly “cheaper” but I was always always always studying and I found it pretty counter productive being in traffic all the time. I kept listening to commute but yet at the same time I was told by my parents that I was no where near being independent which were very contradictory. Then I decided to move out something I should’ve done a year ago.

3. Been more involved in activities – I just started getting involved just this January and I wish I would’ve done it sooner. When i commuted, I went through many attempts and FAILED to stick to a club because I wasn’t able to keep up with the commitment. I should’ve moved out sooner no matter who tells me what.

4. Didn’t apply for so many credit cards – I love to shop and the truth was, I deserved it because I work a lot to pay for rent and the bills, attempted to please my parents (and no matter what I did wasn’t enough), and I never stopped studying–i felt i deserved it because i worked hard but now I have to pay the ugly bills. But lately I’ve been a lot happier and the less need to shop or when I do shop, it’s money I have and I pay in cash :-). From this I definitely did learn how manage my money. I so happy that I’m no longer find myself with no money before the next paycheck and I’m able to  still pay for rent and the bills.

5. Worked less or maybe asked my boss once in a while to give me a break 😦 – i did make it work by always planning ahead but what I really should’ve done was once in a while ask my boss for a break that week  instead of hoping people will get me covered because if I don’t get covered then I’d end up working instead doing the things I’m suppose to be doing.

6. Been more adamant and believed in myself – I never realized how important it was for other people to believe in you as well too but I feel in order for someone to believe in you, you have to believe in yourself. During my time at the university, a lot of my fellow students had amazing support from their parents (aside from a rather generous financial aid package). I mean I was envious of them because some parents go out of their way to pay their rent in the nicest apartment in LA, pay for the tuition, books, allowance, etc. For me, I never had time. But yeah…the whole way through had been a major uphill battle these past two years since I transferred–honestly my parents could care less if I went to a four year and my other ambitions–really they could, they’re proud but not enough to give a hand to at least 50% of the way…But it’s been an uphill battle because I have to explain about the tuition and what each fee means every term and it’s always the same thing. And it’s just…they could care less. It was hard for me to lift up myself you know…and I never realized how my personal problems could also take a toll on my performance in school and social life no matter how much I ignore it. When I followed people instead of following myself and got over it didn’t work out. The most amazing thing that has happened along the way was being part of a Christian club, a transfer club, and my peer counselor because these were three outlets i had talked to, they opened up my eyes that there were other people to look to other than just family or friends at home. They really did make me forget about being enslaved to work and stress so they definitely get my thanks because it’s been such a rough ride.

7. Listen to people less – Being a college student is hard. I mean listen to advice and absorb it but if you feel it’s not gonna help you, then you don’t have to go through with it.

8. Honestly I’d rather be perceived as a snob rather than “fixing” this perception. Back home, I just didn’t want people to think “oh she thinks she’s better than everyone because she goes to this University.” but instead of ‘fixing”, if my friends and family and neighbors really know me then they wouldn’t let this perception  get to them you know. Or realize “hey she’s not like that at all.”

Anyways in conclusion: Definitely make your college experience worth it–but that is if you want this college experience. I wanted it, I really did, but I didn’t get nor did I understand the meaning of college experience. I realize that it’s not about the parties or living in a closet for it to be an experience, but more about relationships. To be more specific, it’s about relationships you make in college. I learned the “we accept the love we think we deserve”–that book I read from “Perks of Being a Wall Flower”. I read this book my freshmen year after losing a close friend and it’s my favorite quote (the whole book is quotable). Year by year, I always had a different interpretation of the quote and I came to arrive that this is what I really do think “we accept the love we think we deserve.” I think I deserve support so I should accept the people in my life who can support me.  Anyways here’s some answers people said about this quote (even though this is an old post there’s quite a few interps).

Wow, that was a ramble. Anyways I better pick up my laundry…

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